Ranking Every Z Movie I’ve Seen
As of writing this article I have seen 2,695 movies. I know this because like a massive nerd I keep an excel sheet of every movie along with pointless trivia that will astound no one at all. And I thought to myself that instead of ranking my favorite movies I’ve seen, it be a more exciting idea to look at each letter of the alphabet and rank the movies I’ve seen under them and for no other reason than it strikes my fancy, we will start with Z. Of the almost 3k movies I’ve seen only a whopping 11 have started with the letter Z.
Before we get to the list however, let’s start with some of that pointless trivia!
Of the 11 I’ve seen, 5 have been R, 2 PG-13 and 4 PG.
4 are from the 2010’s. 6 from the 2000’s. 1 from the 1990’s.
1, 5 Star. 4, 4 Star. 1, 3 Star. 4, 2 Star. 1, 1 Star.
19h 46m have been spent watching Z movies.
11. ZOOLANDER 2
Rounding out the bottom of this list is the god awful, dreadfully not funny, a decade too late sequel to the beloved cult classic. This ranks not only at the bottom of Z but would probably rank close to the bottom on an overall list as well. The movie is a bore to watch and joins the ranks with the other made decades too late sequels that plagued us in the 2010s. coughdumbanddumbertoocoughsupertroopers2cough
Thankfully that’s the only movie on this list that was murder to watch. The rest range from alright to brilliant.
10. ZOOM
Zoom is a goofy family film about a group of kids who become superhero’s under Tim Allens guidance to stop a bad guy from doing bad guy things and it’s every bit as sophomoric and juvenile as you could imagine. Though there are a few laughs to have along the way and any Tim Allen is worth watching for a laugh or two. Also worth checking out for a pre fame Kate Mara performance.
9. ZOMBIELAND 2
Joining the made far too late movie sequels list is the sequel to the zombie comedy Zombieland. It’s not that there’s anything really wrong with this sequel but there’s nothing that special about it either. It’s basically the same movie as the first one, which if that’s what you’re after then this is the movie for you, but it’s just kind of pointless with no justification for its existence. They give Abigail Breslin absolutely nothing to do, disappearing for the majority of the movie wasting one of its stars. It’s just another sequel to a movie that had no business needing a sequel.
8. ZEUS AND ROXANNE
Zeus and Roxanne is as silly as they come and a movie that could only get made in the 90s. Starring Steve Guttenburg we follow a friendship like no other between a dog and a dolphin that become the best of friends and a dangerous researcher who wants nothing but to capture the dolphin for study. It’s absurd, silly and a hoot to watch. It’s a movie from a bygone era of filmmaking that goes down like water.
7. ZATHURA
The pseudo sequel to Jumanji, Zathura is basically the same movie as Jumanji beat for beat except dialed into a sci-fi setting complete with space adventures, robots and reptile aliens. It’s a great sci-fi adventure film helmed by a great director, Jon Favreau who would go on to wow us with the marvel universe’s Iron Man and Star Wars The Mandalorian and you can see why he was given the reigns to those franchises after watching this film. It’s fun, quick witted, light hearted and adventurous.
6. ZOMBIELAND
The first Zombieland was a revelation when it first dropped back in 09. Funny, absurd, with great cut away gags and a surprisingly touching story about family in the zombie age. Woody Harrelson is a legend as always and the supporting cast of future superstars help round out this zombie tale and give it some heart along with the gruesome visuals. Also, the finale at the amusement park is awesome and a great finale to a solid film.
5. ZACK AND MIRI MAKE A PORNO
Kevin Smith was the de facto king of raunchy comedy movies by the time he dropped this film on us. It’s a film that will only please comedy fans like me who will laugh at pretty much anything. Zack and Miri, two lifelong friends who are down on their luck and rent decide to make a porno to help boost expenses and pay for their rent. It’s low scale, absurd and disgustingly funny.
4. ZODIAC
Dark, atmospheric and tense as shit, Zodiac ticks all the boxes on ones thriller checklist. It’s moody, suspenseful and keeps you guessing even after the credits started. David Fincher is a master craftsman behind the camera and he utilizes hollywoods biggest stars to help tell this creepy tale of a seriel killer reeking havoc on an idyllic city in the seventies. Jake Gyllenhaal, Robert Downey Jr and Mark Ruffalo all put in powerhouse performances that help elevate and push you through to the final conclusion. It’s a must watch for anyone obsessed with all the dark seriel killer documentary’s on Netflix.
3. ZOOTOPIA
Zootopia is not only one of the best films Disney has released in their revival years but one of their best films period. Using biting commentary and social themes they create a beautifully rendered world brimming with possibilities. Judy Hops is a bunny with big dreams of becoming a cop in Zootopia but learns pretty quickly that she must overcome the social constructs of modern society if she is too excel at her career. It’s a movie chock full of great bits that gets a lot of mileage out of its city like setting. Nobody does anthropomorphic animals like Disney and they knock it out of the park again here.
2. ZOOLANDER
One of the funniest comedies I’ve ever seen. This cult classic was on my TV every day as a kid when it first came out. With hilarious one liners, amazing set pieces and loaded with celebrity cameos. There isn’t a moment in this movie that isn’t over the top hilarious and it’s one of my go to comedies when I’m in the mood for a good laugh. This is a can’t miss film.
- ZERO DARK THIRTY
The only five star film to grace the Z’s. Zero Dark Thirty is a tense, pulse pounding thriller that races to its intense conclusion with star making performances from Jessica Chastain, Joel Egerton, Mark Strong all the way down to a pre Star Lord Chris Pratt. This movie is chock full of stars all giving it their all to tell this story about the hunt for Osama Bin Laden after 9/11 and the torturous and violent ways we went about achieving that information. It’s a dark and intense flick that is not for the faint of heart but is a must see for any movie goer.
And there you have it, the 11 Z films I’ve seen ranked. With the exception of Zoolander 2 you can’t go wrong watching any of these films and I highly recommend you check them out for your viewing pleasure. Until next time, Adventure On!